Sunday, February 22, 2009

One of the Scariest Things EVER!

Friday night I was in bed watching "The Cosby Show" with Alyssa. All of a sudden the cable skitzed out. It flickered on and off and eventually shut itself and the TV off. I waited a minute thinking it was just this stupid digital transition thing that was unnecessary. When I turned it back on, all was well....except for the channel. See, I had been watching TV Land, but my TV was now on ESPN!!! I suppose this isn't terribly scary to anyone.

I don't believe in signs, at least not of the digitally broadcasted variety. HOWEVER, I don't watch SportsCenter, either. Only Dewey does. My first thought was of him. Keep in mind I have ABSOLUTELY no way of contacting him when I need to. I have to wait for him to call me or get online. There went the rest of my night. I was laying in bed thinking of every bad thing that could possibly happen to him. When I slept, it was restless sleep because any dream I had was a terrible one about him.

Once the sun came up I decided I didn't need to freak out yet, especially in front of the kids, so I put it out of my mind as best I could. I had intended to take the weekend off from any school stuff because I'm actually a little bit ahead...for the time being. But I can't keep away from it, it's just not in me. So I came back here and got to work on some things about 0930. Then my doorbell rang. Who would be bothering me that early on a Saturday? My heart stopped dead in my chest and I felt myself go weak. I remembered the crazy cable thing the night before and immediately assumed I'd find 2 soldiers in their Class A's waiting on my porch with some really bad news for me. Then the kids started yelling about not knowing who it was, which, needless to say, only made things worse. I finally found the courage to see who it was. To my relief, it was a girl selling candy bars for a fund raiser. THANK YOU, LORD! I bought enough for each of the kids and went back to work.

I felt SOME relief for a while. I decided not to worry about Dewey until it was about his normal time to get online. That didn't last very long. Sure, I was engrossed in my school work, so that helped. But everytime I'd take a break (for a drink of water or whatever) I'd remember and try to get back to work.

"He's fine. He's always fine. He promised he'd be fine." Always what I tell myself any time I hear something bad about what's going on over there.

Well, 1530 rolled around and he still wasn't online. After I finished my stuff, I couldn't stand it anymore, so I got comfortable on the couch and stared at my phone. Stared long and hard at it, trying to communicate telepathically with him. I only moved to help the kids with something or to make a head call. Nothing. He had been online about 1530 the day before, why wasn't he now? I waited. And I waited some more. No news from 2 uniformed soldiers is good news, right?

I waited even longer, sending him a "Where are you?" message every 2 minutes. I finally got up and sat at the computer and signed into Yahoo Messenger and Skype thinking he'd be at either place. I waited some more. Nothing. I turned on the TV in here trying to relax a little. Didn't help. Everything was silly women who were completely out of touch with reality that had nothing to worry about but gossipping or something. Still nothing.

FINALLY, at 1803, he logged in. OF ALL THE DAYS FOR HIM TO WORK LATE!!! I was still so worried about him even though I was looking at him and could see how ok he was. I could see him smile and laugh and scratch his head and adjust in his chair, but I was still scared to death.

He finally calmed me down, and I was ok-obviously. Still scary. I'm not one to freak out everytime he doesn't call or log in when he says he will. And I'm certainly not one to think, "Oh my gosh, it's a sign. Something terrible's going to happen." either. But HO-LY COW that was definitely the scariest thing to ever happen when he's been gone. I'm so happy he's ok. I don't know what I'd do without him.

3 comments:

Veronica said...

I would have freaked out too. But then again I am a major puss. You shouldn't be such a puss!

Jeanette said...

I bet you are counting the days and hoours till he comes home. I am glad my hubby is legally blind and the services rejected him. I couldn't be in your shoes. I am glad for families like yours that support your spouses while they serve our country.

OccupyThis said...

Hey Ev,
It's been a while since we've heard from you on the political blog, so I thought I'd extend an invite to comment on at least the latest post. It's about the military vets and how they've been targeted as potential rightwing threats by DHS. Anyway, I thought your input would be appreciated, since your hubby is in the armed forces. Hope things are going ok for you and yours!